In 1994, during the presidential-election campaign, Nelson Mandela got on a tiny propeller plane with his biographer to fly to Natal to give a speech. When the plane was 20 minutes from landing, one of its engines failed. Some people on the plane began to panic. The only thing that calmed them was looking at Mandela, who quietly read his newspaper as if he were a commuter on his morning train to the office. The airport prepared for an emergency landing, and the pilot managed to land the plane safely. When they got in the backseat of his car that would take them to the rally, Mandela turned to his biographer and said, “Man, I was terrified up there!”
We’re not all blessed with the indefatigability, the steadfastness and calm of Nelson Mandela but we do all have to go through periods of crisis. We can suffer from poor health, it could be insecurity in our job, the end of a relationship. Sometimes all of the pillars are shaking at the same time, we can feel like we’re losing control and have nothing to hold onto. These times can feel hugely overwhelming and we can become swept away by our anxiety.
If you close your eyes and imagine a crisis that you’re facing or faced recently, where do you see that crisis happening? What's the actual physical location? It might be your desk at work, or you might picture a loved one in a hospital bed. The chances are you see the crisis as external and happening somewhere else - the insight of mindfulness is that the crisis is also happening within you; that is where you need to begin to address it. Like Nelson Mandela on the plane, you can view the external crisis as outside of your control and accept the reality of it; internally you can choose to focus your awareness. Focusing your awareness regularly in any way will help - on your breathing, on your body or even on the anxiety that you’re experiencing.
It’s also important not to go into information overload. We live in the information age and we’ve got used to having constant updates on everything that’s happened - this isn’t helpful for our peace, our calm, our mental health. Even if the crisis is important and close to you, avoid the temptation to be constantly plugged into it. In the absence of information your mind will try and obsess and take you out of the here and now - notice when it does that and gently bring it back to the present moment.
Crises are inevitably periods of change - a key part of reducing the suffering you experience during it is accepting impermanence. It feels like a cliche to say that change is a part of life, but it’s funny how unaccepting our minds are of it. You’ll probably be familiar with the five stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance - but this is easily generalisable to any change in our lives. Looking at the crisis and seeing the impermanent nature of everything within it will help us to let go of our attachment to the status quo.
And finally - of course - be kind to yourself. Give yourself permission to not be OK. Accept your reaction to the crisis without judging yourself. We can often feel in these times as if we’re not strong enough, we’re swept away by what we’re feeling and we’re a child pretending to be an adult. But the truth is everyone is a child pretending to be an adult, even Nelson Mandela. He was calm because he accepted how he was feeling and you too can say when you get through the crisis - which you will - “Man, I was terrified up there!”
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