I was going running a few months ago and was listening to a favourite podcast of mine by Adam Buxton. As I was bumbling along at my slow pace I noticed that everyone seemed strangely happy to see me. People were smiling and waving - this was not the usual reaction from strangers where I used to live. I was getting really confused until I realised that the comedy podcast I was listening to was making me laugh and smile - that was producing a the warm reaction from other people.
And its not just other people who benefit from our grin. When we smile our body releases hormones that improve our mood and endorphins that reduce pain and stress. It also reduces our blood pressure and can even help us to live longer.
Unfortunately for me I have one of those resting grumpy faces - if you met me you might not immediately peg me as someone who practices mindfulness. I don’t naturally smile, I really have to concentrate to do it. But consciously making ourselves smile is something that I would encourage you to do when we sit on the old cushion to meditate. I sometimes get asked by people, “when you say ‘breathing in I smile, breathing out, I let go’ do you literally mean that we should smile?” And the answer is yes - part of the posture of meditation, as well as getting a nice upright position, is to allow what Thich Nhat Hanh calls a ‘ gentle half smile’ to emerge on your face. It helps to settle us, relax us and focus our awareness.
Of course, we don’t feel like smiling all the time. The suggestion that we should smile to our difficult emotions is something that rubs people up the wrong way sometimes. One person said to me after a guided meditation, “you asked me to smile to my anger - but I don’t want to smile about what made me angry.” Of course you wouldn’t expect to smile to a terrible experience or dismiss how we feel about it - but when we smile to our emotions we’re not dismissing our emotions, in fact we’re accepting how we feel as normal. We’re also reducing the damage and suffering that difficult emotions can create.
One of the most important aspects of mindfulness - and the human experience - is being part of a community. Thich Nhat Hanh calls loneliness the ill-being of our time, one of the ways we can prevent loneliness is to make ourselves as approachable as possible. When we smile we draw people towards us - its contagious and people feel more comfortable engaging you in a conversation. This ripple effect has the potential, over time, to transform relationships and help to create a strong supportive network around you.
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